My First Best Friend

Heather G was my first best friend, and we have been friends now for over 3o years. She is one friend of mine that I can with complete confidence say that she will be just like a sister to me. Her sisters are like sisters to me too.

 Heather grew up in a what you would say, rather different family. I say that because she was the second child of 15children. When we were younger and first met, we were only 7 years old, she already had 7 kids in her family.  I recall her father working from his home, making handicrafts from his wood shop, and It was there that he lost some of his thumb. Her father was as my mom put it had an "iron fist"

 and was really strict. He would spank his kids a lot. I was rather scared of him, but her mom was nice, just always pregnant and tired. Heather had to help the family income by working on a bike route. She and her brother, and as each child got to be old enough, at about 8 years old, then another child must help. They had a rather huge route, because her family knew everyone within a what seemed to me to be a 2 mile radius from their home.. If she was allowed to go sleep over at my home, she would have to get up early to do her route and then do a bunch of chores and then she would be able to play. Sometimes I would help her to finish earlier. So, while she was on her route, I would stay behind and help her sisters with the chores and help clean so that she would not have such a work load when she got home. Her mom seemed to work too, and I would try to invite her to as much things with my family as allowed. As we got older, I would try more intensively to invite her to out of town laces with me, but her father did not always let her come.

     I could name off every name in her family, and fast. We would have contests to see who was faster. She could talk faster than me so she won, but Our summers were sent following people and playing "Charlie's Angels" That was code for spying on people and tracking them down and writing down what they dad at certain times, in secret of course. Then we would write them notes. I think it would be against the law now to do that. Come to think of it, we would be considered Psycho Stalkers now. Maybe our notes would have landed us in jail for harassment, too. And come to think of it, we would have been in trouble for some other violations too. But, it was in the 1970's and we were kids playing around. Well, we were playing Charlie's Angels!

 Heather read every Hardy Boy And Nancy Drew Mysteries that were ever written and therefore was an authority of mysteries and new how to track down criminals. I watched every Mister Rogers, Fantasy Island and Love Boat, along with we both watched Star Trek, which gave me a more feel for the covert side to our operations. I did have a problem with hiding when we were in really intense look outs.  For some reason I had an "over excited bladder" as I called it and when we were on our look out cases, I had to pee. She would always tell me before hand, "Go pee before we go," I would say, "But I don't have to right now" and then when things got really exciting, I would be in the bushes, I would whisper, "Heather, I have to pee" she would laugh and say, "Awww, Lena, Not now! really? That is why I would tell you to go before. " I never could go pee behind a bush like she would.  The pee would run down my leg, or go straight down and on my ants or shorts, the pee position in the bushes always eluded me. Why couldn't it just be like everyone else?

I always ended having to pee in a toilet and running back, hoping I didn't miss anything.

  David's mom lived in the neighborhood, and so I would go there to pee, but, I never wanted to stay long because I was busy. what a summer Heather and I had.

Christmas Memory

I forgot to mention that when I was five years old, one of my most favorite Christmas gift was a Barbie House my mom constructed for me out of a box. 

 You know the saying "Kids would rather play with a box than their toys"... Well, we were so poor, we did play with boxes. Hehe

My mom painted a box and added widows and furniture. She had an uncle make the furniture, I think. And she found some carpet, wall paper etc, and made this really amazing dollhouse for my Barbies out of a box!  She painted the outside white, and I remember the living room of the barbie house was white and blue. I loved that house a lot. I played with it all the time.

 My younger sister sat in it and got in huge trouble for it, and that is how it got ruined. I got her back by hitting her with a broom stick. (yes, lovely sister rivalries)

Leaving the Islands, and Back to the Mainland

Cute little me with my friends. My sister insisted on being in the picture.

Sadly, all good things eventually come to an end. 
   Hawaii was the same. My mom completed her year that she got in BYU of Hawaii. It was time, sadly, to move back to the mainland. I was really sad, although you could not guess by the "good bye" picture above. Those kids above were my friends on the playground. I wish I knew who they were now, but interesting enough, I don't know a  lot of people from those days. I do have some friends from living in Hawaii now. But, I do wish I was able to keep in touch with more of those friends. And I always have wanted to return. 
  I was sad to go back to the mainland. One of the things I noticed the first time I came back was the rain smelled... Well after living in Hawaii, the rain anywhere else was stinky. 
 And the rain was cold. I missed the warm rain. It was magical in Hawaii.
Fresh Coconuts was another thing I missed on the mainland. 
 Below is a picture of me sharing with Izumi's little brother.

I told you I was cute!

We arrived in the mainland in May. I felt like I was in a foreign land. Everything was so strange for me. We were back in Provo, Utah and I found myself in shock in a new school and with just a few days left for the summer. I was so homesick. 
 I was asked to talk about Hawaii when I was in my class. I was asked all kinds of questions, like, "Do they speak English there?" but one person asked me, "Do they have Fruit Loops there?" now that was the question that sealed the deal with my friend, Heather. We became inseparable from that point on. Heather and I were best friends.   
 

Christmas in Hawaii

Christmas Morning. We got Moo-moo's

         I have never hidden the fact that my mother was single and the other fact I never hid was that we were poor. I mean really poor. But, mom never dressed us in rags. Mom always had a very clean home, always had us clean and we had cute clothes. 
  Mom did everything she could to make sure that although we did not have a dad at home, we were not going to dress like rag muffins. 
  We had some pretty sweet clothes too. I remember getting the most fashionable clothes. Oddly, mom's favorite thing to do is bargain hunt. So, although she dressed us beautifully, and did not look cheap, and some of the top brand names, she did buy them at either Thrift Stores, Outlets or on the Sale Racks. 
 With that said, I loved dolls. Christmas time was just the perfect time for asking for dolls, and toys. 
  The doll I wanted was "Baby Alive". Baby Alive was the coolest at that time. She could eat, drink, pee, cry, and sleep, almost like having a real baby. 
 I wanted one badly. Every time the television was on, and the commercial came on for Baby Alive, I would holler for my mom to come see Baby Alive. My mom knew I wanted her. 
 We always had a real Christmas Tree during Christmas, and mom always wanted a Douglas Fir. She loved how full they are. I always thought it was because of the little Children's story "The Little Fir Tree" (Very cute and highly recommended!)
  Mom did what we call in our church,"Visit Teach". Once a month mom would go with another woman from our Congregation, and she would Visit another woman. The woman was assigned, and she would help her, make sure this woman was ok and make sure there was something the woman needed. Usually mom would Visit Teach on a Sunday or while we were in School. Visiting Teaching never interfered with mom being a mom. Mom was also Visited. The women in the church all looked out for one another, and was a very organized and great way to make sure the needs of the congregation were being met. 
  Teaching part came from after Visiting and before leaving, the women would leave a message that was a monthly assigned message. Sometimes the message was on being kind to others, sometimes it was on Judging or How to Draw Nearer to God in a time and day where it is more difficult to.
   Mom and her Visit Teaching Companion one day, while out Visiting Teaching, heard about a family that had just moved in from Samoa. Mom heard that the family did not know any English but she wanted to Welcome this family into the neighborhood and bring them something. (This is how Mormons are) Mom and her Visiting Teacher Companion decided to make a dinner and take it to them, and mom came back really sad. 
  I asked mom why she was so sad, and she gathered us girls around. She said that upon going into this little family's home, there was nothing. they had no furniture, nothing. Only clothes and very little things. Mom did not know what we could do to help this family and it was close to Christmas. We had no money ourselves. 
  With out any thought, My older sister got a big Garbage bag and started putting all her gifts from under the Christmas tree in the bag. 
  I honestly knew I should have been doing it but I really wanted that doll and I thought for sure that I would never get her and knew that she was under the tree for me. 
  But I could not help but think of those little kids with nothing. 
 I went back and forth in my six- year- old- mind.  Should I give all my gifts? Should I give one? Should I not give any?
 I helped my sister put all my gifts in the bag. My younger sister helped with hers, too. My mom never said one word to us. She never asked us to give any, she was worried about how we were going to get anything for the family. This idea of giving gifts came from my older sister, and my younger sister and myself just followed in unison. 
   There was one gift in which was too big to fit in the two bags we had for the family and so as we carried the gifts to the family, the one gift I carried was Baby Alive. I was sure it was her. We had not opened our gifts, we just put them in the bags and carried them out the door. 
  We went to the family's home and they were there. We gave them the gifts and left. We did not need to speak the same language to feel the same that evening in Hawaii. I saw the family's faces when I handed them the gifts with my sisters. 
  I had never seen a grown man have tears streaming down his face as he said,"Thank you". I felt good after. My sisters and I all felt good. It was Christmas Eve and we gave gifts to another family. My mom made us hot chocolate, a Christmas favorite, and we read from Luke 2 about the birth of the Savoir. 
  We woke up the next morning to presents under the Christmas Tree from Santa. WE never expected that, as my mom clearly said Santa would not be able to bring us everything we wanted, you know kids that are more poor than us. But he found us. 
   That was the year I confirmed Santa was real, and I felt the true meaning  of Christmas at the same time.

Lavatia and I on Christmas Day! Yep! 75 F Degrees

More School in Hawaii

The Laie Elementary School First and Second Grade Classes.  I am on the right, trying to peer from behind a Samoan Girl

There were some things that puzzled me about being in First Grade in Hawaii.

 We had a principal that was very eluding. I hardly saw him. But, I did once see this ping pong paddle made into a spanking paddle, with holes. I thought my sister, D, was trying to freak me out (refer to the My mom is not my mom story) and I can not remember what happened, but I was put in the Principal's Office. The Principal sat me down, and talked to me and showed me his paddle. I never ever did anything at school for getting paddled, I want to make that clear. I was a good student, and I liked my teachers, but this school I did not like. I remember throwing fits having to go there.

  I had a teacher that hated me. I thought she did. She would get angry at us kids and yell. So, there were 4 teachers to a class, and 64 of us. My mom was a "Room Mom" and we had to make cookies and stuff for various class parties, I remember my mom saying, "64 kids in one class? Wow!" My birthdays were usually at the time of year that teachers were preparing for Valentines Day, and so for Valentines my mom was pretty tired doing more treats. I got a choice. I would be allowed to buy my treats for my birthday, or make them and I could not make both for my birthday and Valentines. Because this class was so big, I was only allowed to invite 7 kids to my Birthday party. I asked boys and girls to my Party. I kind of got a bonus.

My mom was best friends with another single mother going to BYU of Hawaii also. Her name was S C and she was Haole like our family. She had 4 sons and they were about the same age as I, we did a lot of things together, and so I invited Susan's boys an still was allowed to invite my 7 class mates!!! My mom, knowing that all 7 kids would not be able to come out witted me, but, it was worth a try.

   So, the day came. The sun was hot and sunny that day. It was a perfect day too!

As my Birthday was on a week day, the Saturday after my actual Birthday was the day of my Party.

I had so much fun! Three doors down from me was a little Chinese Family. They were from Hong Kong. Kim Fi Chan and his wife, Wa. Wa had beautiful thick long black hair! I loved her so much. This person was so beautiful and her husband was a good man.

  Well, Angela their 2 year old daughter was the first one I invited to my party. Here I was turning 7 and my mom said, "Are you sure? She is a baby, you want a baby to your party?" I loved Angela so much, she was like a little sister to me, and I had to have her at my party. Well, She came. I have pictures to prove it, they are in Utah and not in Turkey presently so, I will have to just show the pictures I have.

 It is interesting what a child's mind remembers and does not remember.

 I remember three other people being at my party. One boy named Izumi Kyoto (The rest of his name along with time has been erased). He came to my party.  Izumi was so nice and his mom adored me. I would go to his house to play with his Godzilla action figures and his mom would drive to the other side of the island in Honolulu and she invited me a couple of times. I recall going to the Japanese Gardens and then driving through the mountains into a huge Japanese Market that sold everything from Japan there. I returned with a bunch of Hello Kitty Stickers and candies from said store. His mom bought me a dress that I loved wearing. It was light blue and had a zipper down the front. I still have it put away in my storage in Utah. He made it clear that was not the gift he wanted to give me but that his mom gave it to me. He wanted to give me Godzilla Action Figures, but his mom insisted that a dress was more appropriate for a blue eyed blond haired girl. 

Gretchen was a Haole too. She was one of the few in my classes that was a Haole with me. She was also from the same church as I and so we were able to pal around often. Gretchen came to my birthday party. 

 She had an older sister that had a Maori Friend. That Maori friend and I befriended each other years and years later. 

Time, like water to a sand castle, has slowly eroded my memory, however, it is said over and over that I have more memories of my childhood and of this time than anyone of my family put together. 

 We had great Field Trips. 

 Golden Meadows Milk Farm

Japanese Gardens

Sea Wold in Honolulu

The PCC (Polynesian Cultural Center)

The Beach Across the Street

Honolulu Zoo

Miss Barbara's Horse Ranch (One of the 4 teachers I had had a Horse Ranch)

 I think Her Husband owned GunStock Ranch in Laie. We went there twice and they were her horses. 

D had come home one day from school crying and saying that she went to a Bull Fight that happened to be part of a Rodeo. She described in detail and with horror how the Bull was slaughtered and how the swords of the Matador was pierced into the Bull. I listened to her through tears and after a few minutes my mom went in the room with Danae and Danae came out of the room and never talked about the Bull Fight again. At the point, I stopped eating beef. I never realized before where beef had come from. D used to tell me I was eating Dead Animal and that mom had found it on the side of the road. She would say it joking to me about beef and I believed everything D said.  However, that day I thought about how the fat and the flesh were put together and I would look at the flesh and kind of not in a humane way but I would think this had blood in it and sometimes I would find a vein in my piece of beef, better yet, chicken. When it is in the beef, since the beef is brown, it would sort of blend in but in white meat such as chicken, the veins really are noticeable. The veins would stand out to me and if I found a piece of vein in my chicken I would end my meal fast. It drove my mom crazy. She said I was a picky eater. I was more of a vegetable eater and ate tons of salads. School Lunches killed me. I loved mashed potatoes, but the lunch ladies would ruin it with some kind of beef gravy that looked like chunky snot to me.  They had to give it to us by law, but there was nothing in the law about me pulling my tray away right at the last second and the lunch lady ladling the food all over the service line and none of it hitting my tray. It was instinct for me to pull away. The Lunch Lady would get so annoyed with me but, how could they ruin perfectly good mashed potatoes with horrible gravy. To this day, I can not order gravy anywhere. I have been continually disappointed with poorly made and disgusting looking gravy. Word out there. If you feed me, you better be a better cook than my family, or myself in order for me to eat at your establishment. 

We got Free Lunch in Hawaii. Same with Free Breakfast. All I have to say is, I am living proof that if you are hungry enough, and something looks disgusting, I will not eat it. Just because something is free it does not  mean that I have to eat it, and when something is free, it does not make it good to eat. 

  My mom was a Full Time Student At BYU Hawaii, as well as worked int eh Cafeteria. Kim Fi Chan was her boss. He was in charge of the Cafeteria there and would allow us to eat one free meal there a day. Some of the days that my mom had to work I would go there after school when we did not meet her at the beach, and we would hang out with my mom until her shift was over. We would eat there for dinner. The food was amazing there. And, not one made me eat the horrible booger-y looking gravy. 

Wa would come with Angela, and we would play. Those were the days. 

Another thing that now puzzled me about School in Hawaii. we would have cubby holes. In those cubby holes we would put our projects that were supposed to go home for that day, if we had a jacket we would hang the jacket on the hook under our name that matched our cubby. However, I was never scolded for removing my shoes. I hated shoes and I always removed my shoes, put them in my cubby for the day, and would only bring them out of my cubby when I would step on these horrible stickers that from time to time while playing, I would step on. These stickers were opened, and when a victim stepped on them, the plants' leaves would close up and sting the foot of the victim. I do not know what these stickers were called but I remember the pain. The said plant had tiny purple flowers and the beauty of those flower did not make the pain less bearable. I would slip my slippers on and run back out to play, but kick off my shoes within minutes of putting them on. Another time I would wish I wore my shoes, but within minutes of having them on, attribute my shoes to my pain was when I stubbed my big toes. It seemed to me that on BYU Campus, the concrete was different to that of Salt Lake City. I thought it more rough. Little grooves across the side walks. looking back I think it was because of the rain falls in Hawaii, to keep the side walks from being so slick, they would have little groves horizontally across the side walks. Well, I would stub my toes often and the pain and the toes feeling like they were going to fall off. When I had my shoes on It seemed I stubbed my toes more. My mom always said it was my lack of shoes. But she also understood my disdain for wearing shoes, as my mom is a barefoot lover herself. It must be the Native American blood seeping in my veins that caused me to hate shoes so much and when I returned to the Main Land, many times people around me would say, "This is not Hawaii, put your shoes on". How those words stung. Didn't people understand how bad shoes are? to this day, I take off my shoes every chance I get. And am proud of my bare footed walks in beaches, and everywhere else I can get away with   

My Birth Father ... In Hawaii?

While I was in Hawaii with my mom and sisters, my birth father, my dad, visited me for three days. We were in a hotel room in Honolulu. I remember it very vaguely, but I have some memories of that time. 
  I loved being with my dad, and I remember we went to the Japanese Gardens and we went to the beach a lot. 
  If my memory serves me well, my dad also got a bad sun burn. 
 My sister, D and I became quite the companions also.  We were in a one bedroom apartment separated by only a room divider. This room divider was the same idea as having French doors, and was in the same area as the living room, with the "French Doors" separating the living room and the bedroom. with that, there was only enough room for two beds in that room. So, My older sister and I got one bed and my mom shared a bed with Chimra. I hated sleeping with Chimra because she would kick me and took all the covers. 
 Everyday after school my sisters and I would meet, walk together to the beach across the street from the school, and then we would meet our mom there. 
 This was an everyday occurrence. I loved the beach. I loved everything about the beach. I really hated being in Utah, because I would have to wear closed in shoes and it was so cold for me. 
  But, living in Hawaii and California I could wear flip flops, (some Hawaiians called them slippers) And I could wear my swim suit under my dress. 
 There was a janitor that was really weird about me wearing a swim suit to school and made a comment about it once, and I did not understand what he was trying to say but I told my mom and asked her what it meant and she asked me to show her that same Janitor the next day, and my mom met me after school at my class and I pointed him out. Well, My mom told me to stay there she wanted to talk to him. 
  My mom approached him, and let's put it this way... My mom is freaking BAD ASS!  My mom was so cool, I felt this sense of wow!!! She told that guy off and you know what? That Janitor stopped working there too... That is what my mom did, protected us and was awesome at it. 
 You hear of stories of single mom's that allowed their kids to get hurt by the boyfriends that they dated or whatever, not my mom. I recall her telling me later in life that one man wanted to marry her when I was 3, but that guy said something rude about me and she decided to not marry him.  That's how my mom rolled. I was happy. That weirdo guy never came around me again. 

Life in Hawaii

When we had completed the school year, my mom had been accepted to go to school at BYU of Hawaii. 

 This meant we had to move there. No complaints there!

  We arrived about June of 1976, and I vaguely remembered much about that experience, I mean the how we got from the airport to the Apartment we moved into. We lived in Married Housing near Campus, and we really loved it there.  I do recall Chimra's dad brought her over in August before school started.

 The beautiful Hawaiian weather and the people were so kind, we easily made it our home there.