Do you believe in Hauntings?

I do not know if I do or not. I do not know what to believe sometimes. But, I will say this. What I experienced in that house and what my family did, was real. And I am not exaggerating. I can not lie. And I would be a good Novelist, however, these are true life human experiences that I had, mixed in with different people and things only to protect the identity of those who are living. Especially my mom because she is a very private person. And Me because my mom would be mortified if she knew I was writing these. My mom would think I am finding fault with her and I have said time and time again, my mom is awesome and amazing and I love her. I do not have anything bad to say or think of her. My mom is a doll and my dearest protector. My mom sometimes forgets many things I remember. My dad seems to think my memories of certain events are fictitious and that through out time being an adult, my memory has become just a great story. But, I say, I remember many many things that detail can not make up.  And there are somethings that my mind has chosen to forget. For example. Mrs Widow Stanley. This point in my life, I have forgotten her. But, there in this home lies something very sinister. Dark Shadows. This I can not explain. Let me tell you what happened to me in this home

The first couple of days we moved in, things were hazy for me. You know, boxes, the smell of fresh paint, new beds, old familiar things mixed in with new things. 

 I wanted to explore the house. I felt that there was more than I knew about it. My pet Guinea Pig was furry and a baby still and white. All white. I assumed because she had pink eyes she was a she. My mom was kind about her but really, my mom in retrospect hated anything but Bunnies. Looking back, If I had a bunny with long floppy ears and white with black eyes or brown eyes and furry and floppy my mom would have held the bunny. But Guinea Pigs to her were tail-less rats. And mine squeaked. Which my mom I think she tried and tried to think it was cute. But, remembering her face, I think after wards when trying to hold her, she would shutter. I am smiling right now because my mom hated me having her but was happy to see me with a pet whom I loved. Valentine had a cage. When she was tiny tiny, she did not know that a box could be eaten through. But, The first night I was there, she had eaten a hole in her box, and dad and mom realized I needed something metal to hold my Guinea Pig. We went to the store after school and found a bigger type cage because we did not know how big Valentine would get. we got the biggest Rabbit cage we could find and Dad said if she grows bigger than that, we will have a problem. The cage was so big, I remember thinking my little impish sister could fit in it. I would have tried if I did not get in huge trouble. Mom was very protective of her and getting more so. It seemed the older my little got, the more mean she got, and the more her and I fought. My older sister and I would try to include her in our secrets or games, but things always went awry  when we planned to make amiable games or time with her. In this home, however, my little sister was scared. I mean scared. I thought at first that she was not used to having her own room. She never had in her life before. Danae did, from time to time, but I shared with Chimera all the other times. Chimera was now in Second Grade, and I was in Third. I was nine years old and Chimera was still seven, but turning eight. She started getting night terrors and honestly she had them in the past, but not like these. Mom would try to consul her and they were horrible. However, she had a hard time explaining the dreams too. They were just horrible dreams. Danae allowed her to sleep in her room with her, and sometimes when Danae would be at a friends for the night, she would come into my bed with me and sleep. 

  Every night with out fail, my Guinea Pig would be on my bed. Guinea Pigs do not climb and are more burrowers. I would out my Guinea back in her cage. Lock the cage and she would be out again.  

That was the first strange thing. 

  The next strange thing was my closet. 

Chimera was always afraid of closets at night, and I thought she was joking when she said my closet was creepy to her. Even to the point that she would laugh and laugh and I thought she was playing an impish joke with me. 

 One day I was up stairs in my room alone. I saw a door in the back of my closet. I was curious as to where it went and what it was for. I never saw a door in the back of my closet. I cleaned my room eery other day, got dressed, even organized my closet every Saturday, but how that door never came to my attention before I never understood . I asked my aunt (my uncle's wife) about the door. "There is a door? I did not know there was one."  My uncle Tim did not know either. He was the one that remodeled the home.

I dreamed that night that all of the upper house was in shambles. The Oak wood that was our home flooring was gray and full of rot. I do not remember much of the dream, but I woke up and went to the window. It was rainy outside and as I looked out the window there was a light on the ground. the whole out ofdoors was black as black as ebony yet the light was white, a transparent white. I kept looking at it and the light got a little bigger, and floated up to my window and in the light was a creature. It was scary. I thought it looked like an old woman but I can not say. I ran back to my bed. Again, Valentine was on my bed. How she got there, still I have no idea. I put her back in her cage and locked the cage, and laid under my covers, looking at my closet, and the door that was in the back of the closet was opened. I turned over to my left side and hid deeper in my covers. I was just "fracking" scared. I fell asleep again. Chimera came in my room a couple hours later. She kept kicking Danae and Danae had enough. I was too scared to turn her away and so she slept with me. But was not allowed to touch me with her feet. 

The next day I told my mom about my dream and about everything that I saw. My mom said it was all a bad dream. 

 It was a day where there was no school because I wanted to do some more looking around. I asked m y aunt what was down stairs. In the basement. She was in the kitchen. She needed to get something down there anyway and told me to see for myself. I did. It was about noon time and my Aunt Maren was making Spaghetti and she always canned fruits and vegetables. She wanted some tomatoes which she stored in the cellar and asked me to have a look down stairs and while coming back up to please bring her some tomatoes on the shelf. I obliged and went to the cellar. the stairs to the cellar were wide. Unlike David's mom's cellar that was outside and a hole dug in the ground and scary and creepy this one was inside a house. the stairs were concrete and covered with marble and leading to a basement with pillars that supported the house. All of it had some windows, rectangles that were longer than wider, and so there was day light that would come through, and there were lights down there. Although that day they did not work. No matter I thought, because it was sunny outside and I could still see pretty well. As I got to the bottom of the stairs, rats were all over. They were on the shelves, on the floor crawling all over the walls and they were all over the support columns. They were on the shelves that I had to get to to get the tomatoes and on the floor near the shelves was a dead something. I saw teeth, I saw it was rotting dead, I smelled a strange stench and it was freezing cold down there. I screamed and ran upstairs. 

 To let you all know, I had a speech impediment. I stuttered and stammered horribly.  I could pronounce my letters by the time I was 6, I could read and write beautifully, I could talk but my tongue was just not allowing me to say it as fast as I wanted to nor as fast as I was thinking. I stuttered quite badly. It took me a long time to say what I needed to say. When I ran up those steps screaming all I could spit out was "r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-RATS" My mom was not home, she was going to school. My uncle was at school too. My dad was at work but all us kids and Aunt Maren were home. Aunt Maren KNEW and believed me that there was something terrifying down there and she ran down there. The light worked and nothing was there. Nothing. It was clean, with rows and rows of shelves and a cool cellar for storing our food. But she believed me because she knew the house like I did. 

  My mom and dad were not unbelievers of the house, I think that my mom did not want me scared. My mom has this perpetual positive way of thinking which is a good quality in one, however, she perpetual positive thinking left little room to believe that I saw what I saw. My mom's conclusion was that I told too many ghost stories and that I was letting my imagination go wild. My dad's was too. My dad being in the line of work he was in, thought it was my imagination mixed with stress of a marriage, a new family life and moving twice in one year that made it more stressful for me and so I had a more vivid imagination than my sisters.

  My dad has a son that is close to my age. He would come and visit us on the weekends. We enjoyed him coming. My dad went however this time to go visit him for the weekend and it was on this weekend that something more terrifying happened to me. Again, mom was gone, but maybe either studying in the library and grocery shopping while Aunt Maren again was home but this day my uncle Tim was home. and same with my little sister and baby cousins.  I was in my room again. This time, I was playing with my sister, Chimera. She always seemed braver than I in the day time, and at night she was scared. I was opposite. In this house, at least. We were in my room playing with records on my Mickey Mouse Record player when the door to my closet opened. "Chimera," I said, "Look! I told you I have a door. You did not believe me". 

"Oh heck, what is in thewe, Dee?" "I don't know. Want to come with? I don't want to go alone". 

 "But, why I didn't see it befowe" (Chimera could not pronounce her "R" sound.) "Awe you scawed? I am not." "Then, come with. We will go together" "You go fiwst. It is youw woom." "OK."I took two steps in and she slammed the door behind me laughing. I tried the door, but it felt locked. She locked the door? She was laughing but it was a strange laugh. It was deep. It sounded mean, too. "Let me out" I was stuttering. Badly. Her joke went terribly awry. According to her, she was going to come in with me, but thought it would be funny to try to scare me and she closed the door. She intended to reopen the door, but, it would not open. It took me years to believe that she was intending to come in in the first place. And, yet the strange part is this:  I screamed and yelled and shouted, but no one heard me. And when I was finally let out of the room, my uncle had to use a sledge hammer and  saw and knock out and cut the wall of my closet, because there was no door. The room was about 10 feet by 10 feet and just like in my dream. Everything was gray. There was a candle stick on a small what appeared to be a bed side table. And a window. The window was the same size as mine in my room. It was covered though, or not a lot of light came from it. It was as though this was sealed up a long time ago. 

  By the time my uncle got me out, there was a hole in my closet the size of me to squeeze out of and as soon as I came out of the room both my aunt and uncle engulfed me in their arms. I felt safe. My uncle that night, before I went to bed, patched the hole in my closet and said my room closet will never ever open again. He was right. It did not. Chimera could have never known what was going to happen. And what she saw when I was in the room I do not know, and she does not remember this incident, but, According to my aunt years later, when we talked about it, she did not hear me. I did not come down for dinner and she looked all over for me before Chimera said anything about the door. My aunt felt that she should have gotten in trouble for hiding the fact that I was engulfed in an attic, with out the possibility of escape and she knew it but refused to say anything. Whether she wanted me in there, thought it was a game or was scared that she would get in trouble, I will not know. But, a normal reaction of a child who sees their sister in distress is to run for help. Chimera never did. But then again, Chimera was not a normal child, and this house was not a normal house. 

Years later when I was about 22 or 23 I spend a week with my aunt in Nevada. Far away in time and place from the home. I told her all I remembered. She told me little, but sat and listened and said, "That house was evil, Deej, pure evil." She said that once while she was home alone as my uncle had to work a night shift, she heard something in the Formal Sitting Room. We had long moved out of the house. She said that she heard her silverware clanging. She thought maybe my uncle came home from work early. The house was quiet, but that. She said that she got up to investigate and when she did, her sliver knives were flying (or thrown) towards her and she ducked and ran into her kids room to see if they were OK. She said there were many many scary bad things that happened in that house, spirits hoovering over my cousins, and they were not able to sleep. I said to her that my mom kept telling me that my experiences in that home were only a bad dream. She smiled and said, "Yes, that sounds like your mother".  My mom never believed me nor my aunt, and my sister Danae has no memory of our childhood. I think she would assume forget somethings. I would like to know what she does remember, just for fun sake. I know she has since visited the home because now it is a Museum, and is on the registry of Historical Homes. I understand the haunting(s) stopped, or rather, they did not follow my aunt and uncle and their family. So, I think it is located in just that home.

Maybe some of it were in my dreams, but there are some things that you just can not invent. I did not invent those memories of that home. Sadly, we moved. Although I found the home rather scary, I still liked it. It was an old Victorian style, and I thought it was a pretty home. But, we moved. And with that came another new part in our lives. 

This is not my picture. It is from the webpage: whatliesbeyond4you taken by Chris Matheny.

  

Something Different

Last time I wrote, I had shared some things about my schooling in Logan. I did like it there. However, it was different for me and I had not a lot of friends. I did have a couple as I remember having them, but I can not recall their faces. Only hair. And I do recall my teacher. For I hated Math but loved reading. 

 My dad's mother, Grandpa Andrews, lived in Logan. Just down the street from us.

 He had lived in Logan all his life and my Grandma had worked in the small city. In those days everyone knew everyone else and Cache County was known for it's farming. Cheese was produced here and still is and is known all over the Western States for it's production of Cheddar Cheese. The Color comes from a plant in South America that gives it the rich orange color. Many people do not know that. 

  When Grandpa Andrews died, he left his property to his daughter, my dad's mother. (this is to protect the identity of what is true or false or exaggerated or not... As I do not wish to divulge too much about me... OR maybe I do? Not many of you read this anyway.)

My father was given this property and we decided to move into it. 

 My father had decided to ask my mom's brother who was going to USU, to fix up the house with us. He, his wife and two children lived in the bottom half of the house while we took the upper living quarters. 

The house had a big lot. The house was huge, one of the first mansions in Logan, and on this lot sat two houses. A North house was a 1923 bungalow style that Grandpa Andrews lived in with his family, and to the South of his house (which faced North) was our house that faced East and behind us was a rather large patch of dry and hardened dirt that was intended for a parkway for our cars. It was a rather large one. 

 All of this and 80 Acres in Logan Canyon belonged to my new dad. 

I went to see the house with my dad, mom and uncle for the first time. It was a mess. The outside of the house was boarded up and had been untouched, the lawn was untouched too, except for a once a week weed whacking or lawn mowing. That was the easy part. Inside was project after project. Whiskey, and beer bottles everywhere, graffiti, and years of neglect had made the once mansion a big big shell. 

a few weeks later, and to my shock I could not tell it was the same home. As I walked in the front door, I noticed the Formal Salon was no longer a wreckage of  unwanted trash by squatters throughout the years. It was in fact, a beautiful Formal Sitting room. To the left of the entrance was a living room that was neatly furnished and there were two bedrooms and a bathroom that were probably used as servant living quarters in the days this home was built (probably circa 1874-1876) Beyond the living room were French Doors that lead to a Kitchen and that had been modernized and gutted into a really pretty Kitchen. There were stairs and a landing going to the basement and up the stairs. to the right of the Kitchen before the stairs was another hallway that lead to a couple ore bedrooms and another bathroom.

I ran up the stairs with my older sister and we both chose our bedrooms, that was easy. She chose the first bedroom on the top  of the stairs. It was the biggest with two windows. One facing East and the other facing south. Chimra chose the second biggest bedroom in the Middle with two windows facing the south and I chose the last smallest bedroom with one window facing south. My bedroom had a nice closet and hardwood floors and an old rocking chair. It had a couple of old fashioned shelves and a bed that looked like the Quakers built it.  My mom must have found some really pretty handmade quilts from somewhere or had them or something. I loved my room. My bed was small but it suited me. It was a twin. 

My older sister and I were given dolls from our Great Grandma who was Native American. The dolls were not playing dolls but were a long time before. They were made of leather with real black hair, skirts of bright velvet and beads glass beads for necklaces. They had beaded moccasins for shoes and I proudly displayed my doll on my bed, as did Danae, even though Danae hated dolls she really liked her "Indian Doll".  Chimra tried to tear up her doll and so mom gave Chimera's doll to me because I took care of my things, and my dolls. I also had my "Official Muppet Show Fan Club" paraphernalia out proudly so all could see it. Dad would not let me put posters on walls so mom found a good compromise. Mom framed my posters like they were real pictures. I loved it. I had a record player in my room that was a Mickey Mouse record player. The hand had the needle, and when I wanted to play 45's, I could by pulling up the white tab in the middle  of the round about. Mom bought me a Guinea Pig. I named her Valentine. She went in my room and I cleaned her cage every other day and did not even have to buy a lot of saw dust now that uncle was making our house pretty. We loved our new house.

 Little did we know the terrors that awaited us in this house of wonderment, enchantment and our antique mansion of mystery.  

This is not the house I lived in although my Great Grandmother on my Step- Grandmother's side was indeed an Eccles and did indeed grow up in this very house. For this reason I posted this house and not the one that in fact is still standing in Logan, near this home. However, It does have somewhat the same flair as the Eccles Mansion...

Now Comes New

My new dad, and mom needed to go live in Logan and so us three girls went with.
 We lived in a house that was a bungalow style. It was three bedrooms and there were two downstairs but we rented them out to renters as there was a full basement. I had to share with my younger sister Chimera. She was annoying to share with. She had a bed wetting problem and she would insist on sleeping on the top bunk. Need I say more? There was a small school we attended called Ellis. The school was nice enough. I made a couple of friends. I was in the Third Grade. My problem was not kids. It was Math. I was so bad at Math and I tried and tried but it was the late 1970's and in those days, the teachers sat in front of you, told you what the world was like and you did homework and that was that. I wanted to be an astronaut. I wanted to fly. I recall I would draw a lot and they were always flying things. I would draw cars that flew. I day dreamed a lot too. I did not want to be there. I was always reading about far away places and people and my mind was always off in another place. Especially when it came to Math Time in the class room. I was determined to try to do just enough Math to get good grades. My reading was outstanding. Where I failed in Math was given to me a thousand fold in reading and comprehension skills. Why the Education Gods did not want me to learn Math, would be forever a mystery for me. And a struggle. I would have to separate from the class during reading and I would be put in front of this big screen and the film would start, revealing a word at a time. There would be a story we would have to read, and the sentence would come up but depending on how fast the teacher put up the speed of the words coming on the screen, I would have to read them. Then, after, a series of questions and then the next story. I was so bored. The stories were ok but reading was so slow. I would tell the teacher how boring it was, and I would end up  wanting to do other things. Sharing with someone in class was torture for me too.
  It was not because I did not like to share, I was a really nice kid. I just hated sharing with other kids because I did not want germs touching me. I loved and hated school. One thing I hated was the fact that it was so dirty and I would think... I am going to get a disease and die here in the school and no one will notice it is from all these germs. I cleaned out my desk and cleaned the top of my desk every day. One day, because it was so cold outside, and Logan is far more cold than Provo, I asked the teacher if I would be able to stay inside recess and clean the table tops. She liked that and I did. Then after, I sat at my desk and read "Johnny Tremain" a story about a boy who helped Paul Revere in the Revolution. Sometimes I read encyclopedias and other times I was forced to go outside and try to play with my friends.
 There was one girl I quite liked. She was really a nice girl named L But, we did not keep in touch.
My older sister had many friends. One day she was walking home from seeing her friends when a guy started following her and when she walked faster, so did he. She did not make it quite home when she ran to the steps of a strangers house and knocked on teh door and went inside. She came home a little late and told my mom about it. My sister did not get a good description of the man, she was in the 5th grade and really scared.
About two weeks later, I was walking home. I too had a similar experience only, I ran and I stopped running and he kept his distance behind me but again, he was there. I could not see his face, also, but I could see he was wearing thick rimmed eye glasses and he had a long black coat. He wore a hat, like a business hat. I came upon a house but the lady was in my mom's ward. I did not have to go into strangers house, like my sister. I called mom. She came in a car to get me. we drove up and down a couple of streets to find him and could not but we did call the police. After that mom or dad drove us to school.
 I was teased a lot in school for being so tall. My fellow students said really cruel things to me especially the boys. So, a couple of days before my birthday, I decided to knock down those boys in a battle of "King of the Hill" I am not sure if anyone is aware of how to play but the rules are simple and the game is too. The snow that is packed at one side of a play ground to clear for children to play is the object of the game. Getting to the top of  of the mound of snow and pushing off everyone that comes to the top is your goal, to be King. Now, I thought I made this game up because once I was standing on the snow mount and some smaller boys came up to my friend and I. Tired of them bullying me and my friend, when they came up and were once again being rude, I shoved them off the hill and I said I was King of the Hill and it was mine and to back off. Of course that got more kids thinking how cool a game. I did not know it would be such a hit, but it was. My friend and I wanted to keep the Hill as Ours and on this day, the battle was fierce. The Battle was tough. I was wearing a new silk shirt my mom bought me. I looked so pretty that day. I had forgotten to wear pants. What can I say, I was Tomboy sometimes and other times I was a girly- girl. I wore a wool brown skirt with brown thick tights and a cream silk and light blue shirt and I made my hair pretty. I wore brown boots and my orange and brown coat and went to school. Playing King of the hill was hard in a skirt. I got to the top of the snow Hill which was packed snow and smooth. It had become ice. I fell at the top and hit my chin on the packed snow.  My jaw was swollen for three weeks and I was in so much pain. I fell so hard that I had a black eye from the fall. The next day was picture day and my birthday. The rest of the day I was in pain and I did not call home but I did just lay my head on the desk. My mom saw my chin and gasped, "What Happened???" I told her about how I was trying to throw the boys off the hill with bonnie and how we were playing King of The Hill. My mom did not appreciate games and power and the need to be the King of the Hill like I did. she did not understand it at all. As I look back, I even think she said something about how I should not ever even be on the hill in the first place. And went as far as saying I should just do something else. I was so shocked. I was not going to give up my power of the Hill. That Hill was mine. Those boys had no right to it and I made up the game. (Well, That was in my mind, and sadly, Mom disagreed)
 The next day, I got a picture taken. Swollen Jaw, scratches and all.

Sadly, The actual photo I have of that day is not with me right now. This was taken a year later.

The Summer Before Third Grade

My mom had been trying to get into Wymount Terrace Apartments. We had been on a waiting list, and well, Mom was going to marry that Coach from Snow College? Well, She backed out of the marriage and just a couple weeks before going to marry. So, we were in an apartment for a very short time in Roman Gardens. Mom met a guy living in King Henry. Mom eloped when we moved to Wymount and when we came back from Vacation, they were married. This was a shock to me and my sisters. Mom has a different memory of her elopement and somehow thinks us girl were involved with the eloping bit, but that is what happened. Eloping means going off and getting married without anyone knowing, and so mom did that. But, you can talk to her and get a different story if you please. D says "Mom remember the time you sent us to Disneyland so you can take off and get married behind our backs?" but for some reason she never got in trouble for saying it that way. I get reprimanded when I say anything about it. So, I don't. Not to mom anyway.

Now, it is not a big deal. As a matter of fact, I quite love the guy. Back then though, I thought why is my mom marrying him? 

 I tried running away, on my bike, but got as far as 1250 North when my new dad pulled me over and caught me and I told an elderly couple I was being kidnapped. That, looking back was so bad. But, a the time I thought this guy was stealing my mom. 

 Well, the couple did not know what do to, and eventually I went home with my new dad. 

 We moved out and into King Henry for a couple of months until my dad could find a place. 

We moved to Logan where my dad decided to teach. Logan and USU was good, and it was a nice place to live, but I tell you, I missed my dear friend, Heather. 

My mom would allow me to go on a Gray Hound bus to Provo, from time to time to visit my dear friend. 

But, it was a hard time for all of us.